Poems From Back in the Day


So, I have a book in which I wrote a few poems.  I was re-reading these, and thought that one or two were somewhat decent.  These are admittedly from a period when my mindset was darker, so please overlook that.  I think there are nuggets of truth, however, in these poems, and that is why I am sharing them here!

 

12/20/2005

Self-Pity

What a friend it appears to be

How nicely it takes your side

And attempts to smooth over inconveniences

Puts you to fitful sleep with its lying lullabies.

 

The victory is yours in every war

Self-inflicted wounds are but evidence

Of the other party’s guilt

All is yours for the taking, and rightfully so.

 

How delightfully it whispers in your ear

And how delighted it is to find you prey

To fall victim to your own self is weakness

Such a false strength you dwell in.

 

Is it dawning on you yet?

Have you caught glimpses through the fog of the chains

That imprison you?  Gleeful laughter and a

Sinking stomach make for misery.

 

Yes, you see it now, don’t you

How long you inhabited this stinking pit

And by your own choice

Awareness comes too late for escape.

 

That is its best lie

It seeks to hold you in the chains you possess the key to

Hold back your self-loathing, a by-product of its wretchedness

Break its power by shattering the mirror.

 

You fade into the background, your image is impossible

To discern in the broken shards.  For the first time you see clearly.

Without a proper reflection, the focus shifts

The chains come off.

 

The Sequel

 

Seeping back, like wet mud through a sift

Your mind is full of disturbing problems

It is familiar and welcome.  Shatter the mirror and

Break the chains.

~A. Bees

 

Parks

This is the reality

The world that ripples beneath this reality

The ancient remains we’ve built upon

 

Here the noise is silent

The wind, trees, birds possess a

Stillness

A massage for the senses

Here there are no news updates

No e-mails

No sound bites

Just

Existence

 

Here I realize just how far I’ve strayed

Isn’t this all we need?

Here I’m close

So close

To where I should be

Here I feel Him

In the wind, the shifting shades of the leaves

Here I’m quieted, too

Hushed down to the essence

“Be still and know that I am God.”

~A. Bees

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